Tuesday, April 8, 2014

TUESDAY HEADBUTTIN!

When I came down from Mount Vigorous this morning after I injected myself with the blood of a Bull Shark I grabbed the first whiner I saw and headbutted him into a mailbox. Before I ripped his spine out of his slacker body I said to him you are not worthy to walk this planet with the Vigorites who actually want to Unfuck and accomplish. He begged for mercy and offered me his I-phone and his precious Yorkie Boo-Boo. I laughed, tossed the I-phone in the sewer and ate his dog for breakfast with my bowl of oatmeal. If only life would be as simple as this colorful story I just spun for the people. Or maybe before I passed out last night the last thing I heard was the Ultimate Warrior yelling and his theme music kick in haaaaaaaaaaa. Warriors are not born they are made but many of you are content to ride that sodomy train YESSSSSSSSSS.~~~JONESY